guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize