I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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