I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
