Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
