Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
