I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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