i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
