and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I can tuck mytits in my pants
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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