i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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