Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
