im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
its liver damage thursday
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