do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
