I just saw a hot homeless man
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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