A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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