Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize