the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
