love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
