Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize
