Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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