i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
In America we eat man semen.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
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