We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
