He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
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Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
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i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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