I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
it was like eating out sand paper
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone