i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
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He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
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some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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