He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Randomize
