Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
