I have demons in me.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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