This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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