don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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