You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize