I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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