We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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