Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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