I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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