somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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