I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize