We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Bring me that man meat
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
