The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
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