i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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