Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?