She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
