Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Everything about him screamed your future.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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