im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
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So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
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your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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