is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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