I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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