8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be