whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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