Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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