brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
