just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
